*This is yet a fiction nor non-fiction piece. Depends on how the reader judge it*
The Past:
School, this was where the awkwardness of our life starts. It was awkward because we were going through puberty and in searching for the what we like and would want to do in life.
My school days were one of my best moments in discovering myself. I always knew I wanted to write when I grow up, be it a journalist, columnist or writer. I am also quiet 'geek-ish' as I read children books, still. My favourite character was of course, Harry Potter. The wizard that will always saved the day. The miniature version of Superman. Ha, ha!
This happened to be the time where girls in puberty have a crush on an opposite sex. I am no exception.
This was my past. Yes. I remember the person perfectly well because my crush on this person lasted... for most of my secondary school days.
I did not try to be an attention seeker in front of the person. Instead, I started a 'cold war' everytime I see the person. This (unsuccessful) attempt in making 'enemies' was caught by this friend of mine. "You're interested with him?" I refuted her claim. For the entire year, I did not admit I had a crush on the person. The Past me was a person who was afraid to admit.
For the following years, the 'cold war' subsided. I thought if I do not 'provoke' the person or start any fight, eventually I will forget about it, slowly. Yes, I did. I just see the person as a stranger thereafter.
The person and I barely talked in school. After Form Two, I see the person as a stranger. In between we did exchange (as I recalled) a few words as the person knew a friend of mine.
No one know my feelings for the person throughout the five years in secondary school.
I assumed I hid it well and denied all allegations about the person.
After SPM and finishing school, I did not see the person anymore.
Not even a chance of encounter on the streets.
I only talked about the person once during Form Six with this long known friend. Later I came clean with her about having a crush on the person.
This statement is proven true on me.
The Present:
As written on my bio on Twitter, Blogspot and about.me, I am living in a different life after my mother left. I am a 'soon-not-an-undergraduate' (which gave me a sign of relief that I will not be studying anymore in the future, ever).
The Present me is a funny, sarcastic and witty chatterbox. Unlike my past that barely voice out my feelings.
I knew I wanted to write since I was still a child. The writing ambition had been given up after a word of discouragement in secondary school. I rediscovered this love and enthusiasm halfway in my degree.
I am a person who 'love' something for a long time, even if it was long forgotten.
The present me has been single for all the time. In fact I am the 'lone ranger' in among my girl friends. They did asked me, "have you ever thought of getting married?" My answer is yes. Getting married is every girls' dream. To be honest, I dreamt about being a bride, also a wife and mother.
However, how would all these be realized without a partner, soul mate, the one you loved and trust?
The past has 'returned'. I do not know if the 'come back' was purely a coincidence or it is a destiny? I do think it is serendipity too.
It was also the same feelings I used to had (which I denied and suppressed) in The Past.
I would label my feelings in The Past as crush. A long crush.
The Past's 'reoccurrence' has confirmed the feeling of crush to... love.
True. Love, makes a person like me to be less critical and objective as I used to be.
The Future:
There are no predictions, forecasts or prophecies to tell what can happen in the future.
I guess I had found the one I love. It is uncertain for me (still for now) about how faith might bring the one and me together or drift the one and me apart.
Despite that, I truly hope I could have a future with The One.
The One that I love and trust.
The quote actually tells two people to be frank with one another. Opening up on oneself promises (?) a better relationship. A relationship is deemed 'dangerous' or not progressing when any one is not disclosing OR both are unscrupulous or insincere with one another.
Writer's note: This is my first attempt and last time of writing such emotional love blog post, with much cautions. As I always stress out 'social media rules', never post too much and get too personal on the Internet. Also the blog spot disclaimed that this is either fact or fiction. It is up to the readers to perceive it.
Writer's note 2: Today is Valentine's Day. Celebrate it all your love ones; friends, family and lovers. I had this 'pre-Valentine' outing last week with Ju Yi. This 'pre-Valentine' outing served as a compensation for me... for not being able to have a real Valentine with The One.
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