没有妈妈的日子：第61天

The Perfect Fit...

*I guess I need to blog more about fashion, and beauty plus hair products more often as I am (so called) aspiring to be 'Carrie Bradshaw'. Ha, ha!*

I go shopping by myself, mostly. This is what I do these days. At times I will buy what I saw and like... Well, that depends on my mood, too. If I am enthusiastic on shopping, I will definitely buy something.


Movies, dramas always generalized female as shopaholics. Once a girl goes shopping, she will return with large numbers of shopping bags.
OK. That would need some clarification. NOT ALL girls return home with enormous shopping bags. That was media portrayal of glamorous life. And it 'poisoned' certain people badly.
Well, not everyone can afford the glamorous life. So a little advice, shop at your own limits. Never demand for the so-called 'glamorous life' you saw on mass media.


For me, it has been a heartache to shop for shoes. Yes. I hope I am not the only one that is facing this dilemma. It is a problem for me to find... the perfect fit.
I am particular in choosing the right pair of shoe. I believed that a good pair of shoe will 'bring' us to whenever we go and can last for a long time. And it can 'accommodate' any occasions. That were the criteria I looked at when I wanted to buy a pair of well-fitted shoes.

I have four pairs of shoes. That's it. I love shoes but I DON'T buy all the shoes I love.

I went for shoe hunting yesterday. And (thankfully) I found what I think it would the 'perfect fit'.

No. It's not Louboutin, Ferragamo or Blahnik. It is just a random pair of shoes I found, and fits me perfectly well (guess so). 

A shoe is a girl's 'best friend'. A 'best friend' that brings her to a greater heights.
This 'best friend' could be found in everywhere. However, not all the 'best friends' are the right one for a girl.


Finding a pair of shoe is exactly as finding a true love. Yes.

There are many potentials out there. Despite that, do one really find The Special One that makes one's heart deeply attracted and longing for him all the time? The Special One is the one you would have no qualms on being together.

A simple yet deep shoe-searching life philosophy.




Writer's note: Once you found the perfect one, be it shoe or person, never let go.

没有妈妈的日子：第57天

The Past. The Present. And The (Unknown) Future...

*This is yet a fiction nor non-fiction piece. Depends on how the reader judge it*


The Past:
School, this was where the awkwardness of our life starts. It was awkward because we were going through puberty and in searching for the what we like and would want to do in life.
My school days were one of my best moments in discovering myself. I always knew I wanted to write when I grow up, be it a journalist, columnist or writer. I am also quiet 'geek-ish' as I read children books, still. My favourite character was of course, Harry Potter. The wizard that will always saved the day. The miniature version of Superman. Ha, ha!

This happened to be the time where girls in puberty have a crush on an opposite sex. I am no exception.
This was my past. Yes. I remember the person perfectly well because my crush on this person lasted... for most of my secondary school days.
I did not try to be an attention seeker in front of the person. Instead, I started a 'cold war' everytime I see the person. This (unsuccessful) attempt in making 'enemies' was caught by this friend of mine. "You're interested with him?" I refuted her claim. For the entire year, I did not admit I had a crush on the person. The Past me was a person who was afraid to admit.

For the following years, the 'cold war' subsided. I thought if I do not 'provoke' the person or start any fight, eventually I will forget about it, slowly. Yes, I did. I just see the person as a stranger thereafter.

The person and I barely talked in school. After Form Two, I see the person as a stranger. In between we did exchange (as I recalled) a few words as the person knew a friend of mine.

No one know my feelings for the person throughout the five years in secondary school.
I assumed I hid it well and denied all allegations about the person.


After SPM and finishing school, I did not see the person anymore.
Not even a chance of encounter on the streets.


I only talked about the person once during Form Six with this long known friend. Later I came clean with her about having a crush on the person.

This statement is proven true on me.

The Present:
As written on my bio on Twitter, Blogspot and about.me, I am living in a different life after my mother left. I am a 'soon-not-an-undergraduate' (which gave me a sign of relief that I will not be studying anymore in the future, ever).
The Present me is a funny, sarcastic and witty chatterbox. Unlike my past that barely voice out my feelings.
I knew I wanted to write since I was still a child. The writing ambition had been given up after a word of discouragement in secondary school. I rediscovered this love and enthusiasm halfway in my degree.

I am a person who 'love' something for a long time, even if it was long forgotten.

The present me has been single for all the time. In fact I am the 'lone ranger' in among my girl friends. They did asked me, "have you ever thought of getting married?" My answer is yes. Getting married is every girls' dream. To be honest, I dreamt about being a bride, also a wife and mother.
However, how would all these be realized without a partner, soul mate, the one you loved and trust?

The past has 'returned'. I do not know if the 'come back' was purely a coincidence or it is a destiny? I do think it is serendipity too.
It was also the same feelings I used to had (which I denied and suppressed) in The Past.

I would label my feelings in The Past as crush. A long crush.
The Past's 'reoccurrence' has confirmed the feeling of crush to... love.

True. Love, makes a person like me to be less critical and objective as I used to be.

The Future:
There are no predictions, forecasts or prophecies to tell what can happen in the future.

I guess I had found the one I love. It is uncertain for me (still for now) about how faith might bring the one and me together or drift the one and me apart.
Despite that, I truly hope I could have a future with The One.
The One that I love and trust.

The quote actually tells two people to be frank with one another. Opening up on oneself promises (?) a better relationship. A relationship is deemed 'dangerous' or not progressing when any one is not disclosing OR both are unscrupulous or insincere with one another. 

Writer's note: This is my first attempt and last time of writing such emotional love blog post, with much cautions. As I always stress out 'social media rules', never post too much and get too personal on the Internet. Also the blog spot disclaimed that this is either fact or fiction. It is up to the readers to perceive it.

Writer's note 2: Today is Valentine's Day. Celebrate it all your love ones; friends, family and lovers. I had this 'pre-Valentine' outing last week with Ju Yi. This 'pre-Valentine' outing served as a compensation for me... for not being able to have a real Valentine with The One.

没有妈妈的日子：第48天

'Bitching' bastards...


What a vulgar and harsh title!!!

I'm writing this based from a female's perspective.
I had written three parts on 'Girls and Gossips'. Girls, we tend to gather around, bant and rant all issues, ranging from general to the utmost intimate. Get few girls, gather them together and what you will get are non-stop chatters!

As I mentioned in the last 'Girls and Gossip' post, the gossiping channel or I rather call it, bitching time does not only limits to face to face gatherings. In today's world, we are living in the 'internet age'. Undeniably, we also 'live' in the cyber world besides the real world.
Thanks to social network sites (SNS), the bitching between girls had, in my opinion, increased...
Why I say so? That was because I usually bitch with my friends on Facebook, Twitter, and Whatsapp.

Girls love to talk (always). It is our nature. We listen and talk.
Imagine a girl does not talk, for a day... No! That was too extreme. Imagine a girl does not talk for an hour...

OK, this will not happen. Most girls could not refrain from being mute for even an hour, which includes me...

All my life, I had the assumption that only girls are the better gender in terms of ranting and bitching because we can be emotional sometimes on a certain topic that made us wanting to speak out so badly. Research shown (and I used the theory to prove it) that women open up to build a relationship.



Get start to the point after a long introduction.
About a month ago, a source showed me a 'top-secret-OSA-alike' conversation. In that particular conversation, six guys were involved including the source.
As I was chatting with the source on a different conversation topic beforehand, I had no idea how the conversation between us had linked to the 'top secret-OSA' conversation.

The 'top secret' conversation started with some 'everyday-like' topic on what to do, where to go etc. As the conversation progress, one of the guys started to get more personal into one of the members in the group. X started to 'dig' into Y's relationship with his girlfriend. Literally the 'digging' was funny... until it turned horny when Z come into the conversation.
I remembered this good quote that come from Z, "Walau wei! Phone vibrating like mad! Can use as vibrator." That was obscene, however without this obscenity, the conversation would not get funny and extreme.
As I scrolled down the obscene yet silly conversation. To be frank, I was laughing non stop at the 'dirty jokes' by the guys. To what extent these guys can rant on? I then realised the whole conversation was 'talking cock' (talking about rubbish). And the six guys in the conversation... I assumed they were too free and have nothing to do.

The conversation ended with Z addressing a link on Facebook as "Facebook porn page."
The real reason why no one continued the conversation is still unknown. I would not want to make any assumption on the end of conversation.
One thing for sure, the conversation has not been deleted the last time I read.



Yes. These six guys 'bitch' just like any girls do. The only different from what I saw was the guys' 'bitches' on the most random issue and make it into some sex talk (pun intended) while girls bitches on relationship and people around them.




Writer's note: I am now worrying what will happen once this blog post is published. MCMC comes knocking on my door?
If someone asked me who disclosed this 'top secret-OSA' conversation, well, this particular source is someone anonymous. Say it's a combination of John Doe and Jack Reacher?